Welcome to my new nephew!

This past weekend we had Beulah (Sarah's cousin) and her daughter Mary visiting, and I got to do one of my favorite things -- have a baby fall asleep on my chest. That's got to be the best feeling in the world.

Obviously I've been thinking a lot about miscarriage and what it all means and everything over the past couple weeks.

Most of the people that I had talked to, and I think all of the pregnancy books that we read say not to tell people that you're pregnant until the 2nd trimester, in case you do have a miscarriage. It would certainly be easier not to have to tell people, but I can't imagine going through this without the support of our family, friends and church. The prayers and help that we've gotten have been invaluable. And it wouldn't really be fair to the child that we lost, not to have anyone know that it existed at all.

For I, the LORD your God, will hold your right hand,
Saying to you, ‘Fear not, I will help you.’

Isaiah 41:13

I've learned a lot during this time. Back when we started worrying (occasional spotting started in December), I told Sarah "there is nothing that we can do to make this baby come, and nothing that we can do to keep it from coming". (Obviously short of me abusing Sarah or getting her hooked on drugs or something :P). From the very beginning it was in God's hands. Especially since we had been trying for a while, we knew that anything we got was a gift from God. Being able to lean on Him in this time is invaluable -- I don't know how a non-Christian can get through some of these tough times in life.

Sarah and I miscarried early Thursday morning (1/3). She's doing fine physically, just very weak and tired. There shouldn't be any issues with future pregnancies or trying to conceive. Emotionally, it's tough but we're doing okay. We want to thank everyone for their thoughts and prayers this past week, we know that we couldn't get through this without your support.

Merry Christmas to all :) I hope everyone is having a good holiday.

Sam (Sarah's brother) gave Sarah and I a name idea if our baby is a boy: Evanda Chris Heilman. It has a certain ring to it, don't you think?

If you can't figure out what that is, it means that Sarah and I found out that we're going to have a baby :). Our best guess as to a due date is early August. We don't really know anything yet (doctor's appointment is Jan. 8th), but we're very excited!